A New Perspective: “I think I can do better” | Real Estate Insights

How to avoid rejection and find your best match — whether a buyer for your home or your partner at the middle school dance.

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The personal stories of one Realtor’s battles and triumphs in the highly-competitive Bay Area Real Estate Market, seeking to illuminate and humanize the very real ups-and-downs of homeownership.


Congratulations to me; I’ve moved up to the intermediate class in my Monday night salsa lessons. That doesn’t mean; however, that I’ve stopped attending the beginning class that proceeds it. Having roped in a willing friend to join me (once Cliff decided he was NEVER returning), it wouldn’t exactly be polite to leave her dangling on her own. (She may be my best partner.) But when Anna departs at 8pm, I’m left to fend for myself with the more advanced dancers – most of whom have taken lessons for many months, if not years. No matter, I’m not easily intimidated when it comes to this particular arena. I’ve always been able to follow the beat, and I’ve clocked more than my fair share of instruction in dance studios. (My “claim to fame” is that I spent two years dancing in the Bugs Bunny Review at Great America.)

But I will say there’s something decidedly uncomfortable about sitting on a bench waiting to be asked that transports me straight back to my 7th grade cotillion experience . . . I’d crossed the auditorium (it might as well have been an ocean), to ask a popular boy if he’d care to dance and instead of saying “absolutely,” he looked me up and down, tossed his sun-streaked hair to the side, leaned back on his heels, and said (with ZERO hesitation), “I think I can do better.”

To be fair, he probably could have; the shiny pink, puffy-sleeved ball gown, the horn-rimmed glasses, and the reflecting silver braces didn’t exactly scream “cool chick.” Moreover, he was clearly out of my league, but all the same, my 13-year-old self confidence was COMPLETELY shattered, and I felt both mortified and embarrassed.  Thus, began the walk of shame back across the auditorium floor to my friends. (I’m sure I burst into tears when I got home that night.)

It’s important to note that before my sister and I had left for the evening in near-matching taffeta dresses that our mother had sewn on her trusty Singer (those dresses were the fanciest things we’d ever owned), our mom insisted that Jill and I dance with anyone who asked, explaining that it took “real courage and nerve, and we weren’t in the business of hurting people’s feelings.” (Clearly, this boy’s mother hadn’t coached him on the same rules of etiquette.)

Suffice it to say that ‘lo these many years later, as one of the older ladies in attendance, I’m once again sitting on the bench during the “free-dance” period. While I’d like to say that maturity and wisdom more than make up for the slight, it’s not true – rejection feels awful at any age. (No, I haven’t yet seen a therapist about this.)

Needless to say, rejection, when it comes to real estate, is just as upsetting to Homeowners, especially if you’ve done everything we’ve instructed you to do, made the investment, and taken the difficult leap of faith . . . . So to watch other homes quickly sell while yours sits idly by, is akin to having no one ask you to dance. (You knew I’d get there eventually.) 

NO ONE likes to sit on the bench, no matter the cause or justification. And NO Realtor® likes to be in that position either. (Sarah and I want all of our Sellers to experience great success.) Try to remember that selling a home is ultimately a business transaction – not an emotional one (although it will undoubtedly feel emotional.)

This much I know: if your home is failing to find a partner, there’s usually a good reason.

Here’s the thing, having sold homes for more than 20 years, it’s categorically true that ALL homes sell under the correct circumstances. Therefore, if your home is failing to find a partner, there’s usually a reason why.

Ask yourself the following questions:

  • Is the home priced too high?
  • Are your expectations out of alignment with the marketplace?
  • Have you done everything your Agent asked of you?
  • Is the property more dated than its competition?
  • Are their inherent flaws that are impossible to fix (Ie: busy street, stairs to the front door, bad floor plan, lack of a backyard, etc.)
  • Did the Inspection Reports uncover any “fatal flaws?”
  • Are you selling the house “privately?” No signage, No Opens, No Brokers’ tours, No Nuthin.’ (That’s almost always a mistake.)

If the answer is “yes” to any of these questions, you’re likely to be disappointed (but shouldn’t be surprised)  when the house is passed by. With interest rates having more than doubled, Buyers have become very particular about their hard-earned cash, and some of them, quite frankly, simply believe: “they can do better.” They’ll wait it out to see what’s coming next.

If that’s the case, it may be that it’s time to change tempo with respect to your strategy. In fact, you may have to correct what’s correctable, lower the price, or reinvent the house with a fresh new approach, but IF you’re a REAL Seller and IF the goal is to sell the property, then I urge you to cross the auditorium and dance . . . .

How can we help you?

Julie Gardner & Sarah Abel | Compass Realty

Not just Realtors, but consultants in all things house and home, we’re here to educate, explore, examine and refer . . . In short, you may count on us to take care of your home as if it were our own and anyone who knows us, knows we take pretty darn good care of our homes.

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